Life is very busy lately. I go off to work, canie to school, and when we're finally home again, we each do our own thing. I've been leaving him to his studies, knowing he'd get grumpy with me for interrupting.

I hadn't imagined that he'd feel neglected instead and find a girl online, develop feelings for her, and then tell me a month ago, he didn't love me anymore and he didn't think I loved him either. It was the surprise of my life.

There must be more to the story, but not spending time with each other has really made things worse. We agreed to try making time for each other, to talk more and listen better, and so on. About a week later when I found out about the girl (who he'd met 3 days before my big surprise and already developed some serious feelings for her within those 3 days), he was of course not happy... but it was I that had to convince him that he had been cheating on me. It is cheating, right, when he called her 'my dear' and 'my love' and said he missed her, wanted to be with her, hoped to dream of her, and didn't mention he was married?

I guess sometimes I don't act very nicely towards him... I am doing everything, EVERYTHING for him, apart from his studies and driving him places. In addition, I have to keep up with my own work and studies, and I find it very hard to relax because I have so many things still to do.

It feels unfair. I take all the responsibilities, have no time or energy or happiness or relaxation, while he spends his time on the computer - if not studying, then chatting with the girl. Even more so because he stays up late and chats online with her. He gets tired and I get tired too - last week I stopped sleeping because who can sleep when her husband is up cheating on her, or even if he isn't cheating on me all the time, how can I trust him?!

As soon as I found out about the girl, I emailed her and told her about me. My husband wanted to continue to talk with her because he felt he needed her as a friend... He is neglecting his wife and friends to talk with her. Maybe he thinks she, a practical stranger, understands better? He certainly can explain himself better by chatting online. I have decided to go online more and try to chat with him. Not sure what else I can do, other than pray. It is particularly hard for me, seeing him spending time with her, then coming over to me and spending time with me, as if he can't decide between us. I feel betrayed, and I want to fight for our relationship. I cannot do this alone.